Saturday, May 31, 2008

Catch that train

Sand castles!!!

Brackets = secret message

The other day [I] made (my)self {eggs} with bacon. I thought "Hmm, I'm just {like} a real breakfast chef! Yes I [am]." So I grabbed [a] blue (spatula) and gave {the} [lazy] susan a {good} spin. Bacon (is) good. Then an egg blew (up) and knocked {me} on my [bum]. I'm ok though.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

People that need to shove it

I'm not kidding about this:

Every time(EVERY time?(yes, every time.)) I sit down to make a blog entry, the first(the VERY first?(yep, the very absolutely first)) thing that pops into my head is "how about I make a post called "hey, shove it right now" or "people that need to shove it" or something like that?" My old pp8 roommates can verify this if they remember when I made a list with the very name of this blog post on the whiteboard on our fridge. (The board actually had two columns; the second was "things that need to be shoved.")

I don't actually think about specific people that need to shove it, I just (for some reason) ALWAYS think that it would be amusing to make a blog with that title. I usually snap out of it. Today I had to do it just to see if it would appease my nagging mind.

I told a few people a long time ago about my idea of making a Web site called "People That Need to Shut Up." That's a little more rude than "shove it," but the idea is that people would go to the site to do two things: post the names of people that sincerely need to shut up, and check to see if their name has been posted. I planned for it to become the new short-lived internet sensation that everyone talks about for two weeks, then completely forgets about. Two weeks tops. But it would get millions of names. Oh yes.

I even decided that I would post my own name, so that I wouldn't be sad to see that someone else had posted it.

To liven up this boring post, here's a picture of a guy with a great 'stache.

Monday, May 19, 2008

bloggin' slump

To get out of my blogging slump, here's some great sentences. I made them using spell check, like Kyle and I used to do.

-She flaps the diffused odd seats in tens silly flood kills and snout flange.

-Down that strider bait I healed and dimpled all the fiddles.

Ok, so they're not entertaining. Actual blog post:

So I went to California this past weekend. I played on the beach. I saw the Alcatraz and the Golden Gate Bridge. I watched two of my favorite single people in the world become two of my favorite married people in the world. I sat with two brilliant minds and discovered the greatest word on the planet. I heard a secret. I went on a completely pointless hike.

I'm a wimp. And what's more! When I came home, I caught both of my roommates swingin'. Foucault and Nemrow would have been ashamed of me.