Google isn't cool

I was a long-time Google fan. They'd never done anything to stab me. Well now they have. Accurate and accidental? Not anymore. They might as well have sent me an email saying "You never existed."

Do it Jimmy.

I win! kind of.

Ok, so my blog is now the only Google search result that is officially accurate and accidental.

However.

There's a book called "Accurate and Accidental Empathy" by Michael Chandler.

I'm currently trying to hack into the book so I can change the author to ME.

Analog hacking. It's gotta be possible. I can poss anything.

Things that are accurate and accidental

What I did:

1. Googled "is a great adjective" in quotes.

2. Got "gromphibbious," "nutty," "weird," and "fueled." Top 4 results.

3. Googled "what do gromphibbious, weird, nutty, and fueled have in common?" and looked for the first adjective on THAT page.

4. There were no results. And it told me that the "and" operator is unnecessary.

5. Unnecessary it is!

6. Googled "is the opposite of unnecessary" in quotes.

7. One result. Accuracy.

8. Googled "is the opposite of necessary" in quotes.

9. The third result was the first that had a real adjective for me. It was "accidental."

10. Set the title of the blog post.

11. Googled "is accurate" in quotes.

12. Googled "is accidental" in quotes.

Here are five things that are accurate and five that are accidental: (I picked my favorites from the first 2 pages of each)

Accurate:
1. Wikipedia
2. Passion
3. Mohs Micrographic Surgery
4. SenseWear(R)
5. My clock

Accidental:
1. Injury
2. Nothing
3. Whatever
4. Death by sunstroke
5. Fate

Then I Googled "is accurate and accidental" in quotes and got nothing. Then I googled "is accidental and accurate" in quotes and got nothing. I hereby declare my blog to be the first page on Google to contain something that is both accurate and accidental. Here it is.

Alan is accurate and accidental.

I hope I documented my process well enough that you can all repeat it and verify my steps.

I'll let you all know when it's official.

Things to forget

The following things are worth forgetting, and have been sorted by category:

Because it hurts to remember them:
- that Mr. Rogers died
- your first rear-ender
- homework
- that there are people out there who actually watch America's Top Model
- that Council Bluffs isn't going to run for senator
- middle school

Because I do it so often that it has become a habit:
- homework
- homework
- people's names

For creative, crafty reasons
- that speeding is illegal
- how much you owe someone
- how much you hate someone
- which kitchen utensils are yours
- homework
- about that 6:00 AM meeting

Sheer unintelligence:
- where you live
- what you're allergic to
- whether or not you're gay
- ok, so these are actually NOT worth forgetting.
- anti-homework

Politeness:
- that someone stole your couch
- that someone wigged out
- that someone etc.
- please don't do your homework. It will make you unhappy.

I'm avoiding homework right now.